I’m going to talk about the voices in my head that talk I can remember hearing from about the age of 12. I thought they were calling my name. I would be sitting in another room to where my mum and sister would be, maybe not even on the same floor, doing something and then I’d hear someone say ‘John’. Thinking it was my sister or mum, I would wait to see if they called me again, before going to see what they wanted. I would then hear it in quick session ‘John John John’ so I would stop what I was doing and then shout down or go down to where my mum and sister were and say yeah what do you want, they would say “nothing” so I would go back upstairs.
It wasn’t until my later years as a teenager that I started to have more then one voice going on in my head, but I didn’t want to tell anyone as I thought they would laugh at me and not take me seriously, so I kept it to myself which was probably the worst thing I could of ever done as I didn’t get the help with how to deal with them. I thought I’d take you through each voice one by one .
So the first voice I have already talked a little a bit about it can sound really close up and then at times it can be really distant. It can happen at any time of day or night, which is sometimes confusing when you’re in a place full of people.
The second is a male voice saying “help me” in a deep voice but it can also be a high pitched voice. This voice has me wondering whether it is saying that I need to help my inner child.
The third is a female and male voice together. I can’t make out what they’re saying. It’s like they’re bickering at each other or arguing. It’s also quite distant, apart from when I’m struggling or stressing. Then its really close up but I still can’t make out what they are saying.
The fourth is a lady who tells me that I’m no good, that I’m rubbish at things. While I’m writing this out, in my head she is telling me that this isn’t going to be good, so why bother?
The fifth is a male voice but like the female voice, he also tells me that I’m no good nobody wants me here and that I should be by myself. I should cause harm to myself so that I’m not a burden to anyone else.
Voice six is male that laughs at me when I feel nervous and scared. I feel that it takes the micky out of me so I quite like this voice.
I often get asked would you want to be without the voices in your head and I say no. They’re a part of me and although sometimes they scare me, I don’t think I could cope without them having known them all these years.
Around 1 in 10 people hear voices. These could be bad experiences or they could be good experiences with hearing voices.
Voices in someone’s head does not mean they are schizophrenic. Understanding more about mental health can help you understand things that people say or do. Research what a diagnosis means, learn and understand more about it and this will take away the fear of mental health challenges.